This is something we all experience.
This is something we can fear, if we mainly base our value in other people’s perception of us,
to others, it’s a place of refuge, a time where they can look deep into their hearts and get away from the distractions and question life, trying to make themselves better.
Then there are others who find being alone tiresome, boring and they fear it, they fear their own thoughts and their own perception of self. I think it’s safe to say a lot of people have experienced a glimpse of each of those responses to being alone, in their lives.
When you are alone, you tend to think; some of us think a lot, some a little and some find a way to keep themselves busy instead of thinking.
The questions we ask ourselves when we are alone, tend to be our identity defining ones, whether we like it or not.
The more honest we are with our selves, the more meaningful our questions will be.
A major influence to how honest we can be when we are alone, i think is related directly to our secrets.
The broad perception of a ‘secret’ may cause many of us to associate a secret with the feeling of shame. Although a secret can be related to shameful things we think or do, it is not always the case.
A shameless secret may involve jealous ideas, a bitter view of someone or something, a hurt you experienced which no one has acknowledged and so this keeps you locked in your own world, or a sadness which came from an experience that you can’t understand. They were just examples, there’s more but i can’t think of all of them. This is to get you thinking.
To cut this short, being alone should not be seen as a negative experience, our hearts need a place of rest, free of judgment and prying eyes. In order to fully embrace who you are and find out who you want to be, i suggest that you try to be honest with yourself and question your inner frustrations, or alternatively, your complacency to life.
Whatever you feel, if you feel you need to change, to become the person you truly desire be, then it all starts with accepting your self, forgiving yourself and embracing the things you love. Without acceptance of your own life, there is only judgement left, then if you start judging yourself harshly, you grow bitter, you become dull, you can get depressed. So embrace yourself, then you may find embracing other people isn’t really that hard after all.